Thursday, 4 August 2011

Cytotoxic Mumma

I had a most interrupted sleep last night. The night sweats woke me so often. My beanie was on for an hour and then it and the blanket were thrown off. How many times this went on, I do not know. Either way, too many times, for my liking. The last couple of weeks, I think I managed to sleep through the dance. But now, with the chemo affecting my sleep, I was up non-stop. That, together with the fatigue, made for one tired mumma, this morning.

My taste buds have been lying to me again. Food and drink that I should have enjoyed were gross. As always, I get the need for sustenance, so I forced the food down, together with my last day of chemo drugs! Much of the day was spent sleeping (and battling the hot and cold changes of course!).

The husband has fulfilled his vow to the tea. In sickness, he has helped me. What a treasure! His being at home today (and tomorrow) has been the best. He has run the house and allowed me the chance to simply rest, rest, rest.

At lunch, I was motivated enough to make a Decadent Fruit Dip from the Everyday Paleo website. It was great to be able to taste the strawberries and apple that I dipped. I don't know enough of the workings of taste buds to understand why some tastes remain and why others become so skewed. But there you go, I could taste the fruit and the dip. It was yum!

When I awoke from my afternoon nap, I desperately wanted to listen to music. Music has always been an escape for me. Whether it is me playing (not much time for it these days though) or listening. But what should I listen to? Then I thought of our Australia girl, Jess Mauboy. I searched youtube for, "What happened to us?" and played it over and over, real loud. It was then that I was reminded that this was the song I sang as I distracted myself in that very first invasive test; the fine needle aspiration, all those months ago.

Next post, I am going to reveal my Breast Cancer Soundtrack; the songs that I have listened to, on this journey. I got real excited, this afternoon, as I jotted down the songs that distracted me, gave me inspiration and the ones that helped me celebrate the little things.

The power of music. It can sooth the savage...chemo.

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