Why?

I just realised that it has been a couple of days since my eyes were watering. It's safe now, I'm sure, to say that the drip has definitely been switched off. And then, just when I thought there wasn't going to be any more new side effects, along came this strange one.

If I had experienced this before, I know that I wouldn't blame it on chemo. Especially, when it's just so...weird. Could chemo do this? There are no photos for this one because it involves feet. Who wants to see a picture of someone's foot? Ok, please don't answer that. I was removing nail polish when the scale of destruction was revealed. Actually, I had noticed that my feet, in particular, the skin on my toes was peeling away. But, it's way more than it should. I seem to be shedding the skin from my toes. The process is well and truly on the way. Enough on feet. Speaking about strange though...

I thought it might be worth sharing how our family came to adopt such a restricted diet - paleo. Months on, we are now finding this new way of approaching food is actually developing creativity. And, it doesn't seem so restrictive anymore.

There are actually a number of factors that led to this dramatic change in diet. Child number two, according to our plans, was the last one. So, I always had in my mind that I would really focus on getting fit and losing some kilos after the birth (mums, you can relate to the enormity of that task). Then, to our horror child number two was diagnosed with pulmonary stenosis (a blockage in the pulmonary valve). It was a very scary time for us; we had to decide whether we would go ahead with open-heart surgery or cardiac catheterisation. We decided on the latter option and within weeks our two-month old was home and recovering well. But, what concerned us was the fact child number two would need antibiotics if they ever required dental work. Can you believe that something as simple as dental work could actually give a "cardiac-kid" heart disease? This made us so conscious of giving out sugary treats; which were pretty common in our diet. How do you tell a child that they can't have sugar? Is it possible? We started eating a few vegetarian meals a week, did some exercise and cut down on the "bad" foods. We weren't satisfied with our progress. It was then that we came across this particular diet. We did enough research to arrive at the decision that this was for us. The bonus was, of course, that this way of eating has been linked to preventing cancer.

I got on the bandwagon too late it seemed. The doctor told me that my cancer would have been growing from August 2010. By the time I got the diagnosis though, our family was fit and healthy. We had coupled the paleo diet with exercise and were so surprised at how good we felt. There's a lot of cooking now but, it makes sense to cut out all of the stuff in food that actually isn't food. I am totally motivated too though, because I want my body to be able to fight off any abnormal cells next time they start multiplying.

Whole30, Day 7:

Breakfast: Hot Nutty Cereal

Snack: Nuts

Lunch: Chilli and garlic prawns on spinach leaves

Dinner: Beef chilli on lettuce with guacamole

Snack: Pancakes with berries

I have allowed the doctors to treat me with their medicines. In fact, after radiation I will begin a five year hormone treatment. Watching what I eat and electing to cut down on the use of chemicals, where possible, is how I wish to continue the fight. Before my diagnosis, it had always bugged me that so many people were getting cancer. Could it be what we eat? Could it be the chemicals? I have no idea. But, I'm enjoying my food journey and I'm finding it interesting to discover how many people are opting for the organic/natural/chemical free way of life.

Radiation Therapy 3 of 30

I really believed that today I would be able to talk food. I was even trying out titles in my head earlier this afternoon. As it turns out, I do have something to report on radiation, so the other stuff will wait another day.

Today began as normal as any other. I have to admit though, that I did think of the Tough Bald Chicks a lot; some were having chemo for the last time, yesterday. I was reminded of the pain in my arm on the trip home, I remembered the lovely staff in daycare and I also remembered the anguish of the husband as he braced for absent-me. So, while I was happy to be past that, I knew that there were others in that position. I wish them a speedy recovery and am very excited for them to have beaten chemo.

I felt pretty lazy today. I'd like to blame that on the weather; cold and windy.

Anyway, I had a late afternoon physio appointment prior to my rads. As I have come to expect of all the staff now, the physio was so kind. I discussed, with her, the concerns I had regarding my swollen arm. She measured strategic points of both of my arms and saw a significant difference. This difference warranted weekly appointments and a sleeve and a glove. It's "prophylactic" she told me. Even though I only had four lymph nodes removed, even though I had exercised and even though I had incurred no injury (even that as small as an insect bite) to my arm, the physio was concerned that my arm was moving towards symptoms of lymphedema. And, it is likely to get worse during radiation. I will certainly look the patient with this grande bandage-type accessory. Fortunately, perhaps, for me, there was a mix up and I will not receive my cool fashion item until Monday. So, I have a weekend of freedom before I don the all-day wear. Yes, it wasn't news that I wanted to hear. But, it's no big deal really.

After the physio, I went straight through to my rads. I didn't have to wait today. I was seen to straight away. I only got one stitch in. I was looking forward to doing a little knitting. Oh well, I have 27 more chances at that... When I get into the teens I think I'll be pretty excited. Come on thirty treatments, I want to celebrate the end of this chapter.

It's the third day of my Whole30. I was really hungry this afternoon; before my physio/rads appointment. So, I made an extra meal. But, I really haven't had any cravings yet for the off-limits foods. That's real good. Having meals that fill me up are the key, I reckon, to keeping to the regime. Anyway, this was my food journey (yum!):

Breakfast: Peach and Pecan Scramble

Lunch: Leftover rissoles, salad, eggs and mayo

Extra meal: Fried chicken and tomatoes

Snack: A few almonds

Dinner: Meatballs in bolognaise with broc

Snack: Coconut bark

I learnt two things today, at the hospital. A study is currently being conducted on the benefits of doing weighted exercise while undergoing treatment for breast cancer. The study is leaning towards the result that doing weighted exercise is not a bad thing. The second new piece of information, I gained today, was that patients who experience fatigue are actually encouraged to walk. These two things are now a justification for me to keep exercising. Yeah, yeah, I won't push it but...I will exercise (even if it's light) in order to fight off the fatigue (and because I want to *folds arms and stomps feet*).

P.S.

I forgot to mention, in Monday's post, a little moment in child one's Spanish class. At the beginning of the lesson, the teacher asked the children what they were doing after class. It was soon my child's turn to answer. Here is how it went:

Teacher: And what are you doing after class?

Child #1: Going to the hospital.

Teacher: Do you know someone who is sick?

Child #1: Yes. Mum. She is having radiation. She has had chemo.

I felt really sad at that. I don't know why though. I questioned the husband, perhaps he could explain why I just had such a pain in my heart. There is understanding there, we had wanted that. But, why did I feel upset about it? I don't know. Anyway, the hope is that in a year or two, child number one will simply remember spending lots of time with friends and family. And not, the occasional visit to the hospital and certainly not the week we got the diagnosis.

Radiation Therapy 2 of 30

There is so much that I didn't get out last time I checked in. Things like, the waiting room, the staff, the tingling and some stupid thoughts of mine.

So, when a patient enters the Radiation Department they are required to hand over their appointment book to the staff and walk around to the waiting room. This wing of the hospital is all new. It's flash as. In the waiting room, patients may sit and stare at each other, chat with their BYO support person, read magazines (supplied), wash their hands with disinfectant as often as they like or knit (knitting needles and wool supplied).

My time in the waiting room allowed me to see other cancer patients undergoing treatment. This is always a great way to get some perspective on my own "troubles". There sat a man whose lips were blistered. The skin around his lips, and particularly on one side of his face, was red raw. There is no way that man is able to talk, eat, swallow, or even smile without some severe pain. I can definitely be grateful that treatment, for me, will not be debilitating. Tonight, I knit as I waited to be called in for my rads. The nurse informed me that once sufficient knitting had occurred that she sews all the pieces together. The final product is then donated to St Vincent de Paul. I felt happy to be contributing to the knitting box.

The department is so well run. Everything seems to have been considered. Tonight, the husband was able to come into the room where the rads are delivered. The radiographer explained how the laser worked and was prepared to answer any questions we threw at her. What a fortunate little Aussie I am to be receiving such top treatment!

Yesterday, when I returned home from my first treatment, I was sure that I could feel a tingling sensation in my right breast. I am told that it is not until week two of treatment that the effects are seen and felt. Is it all in my head? Am I an attention seeker? Who knows. Actually, the doctor probably could answer those questions. But, there is no way I am willing to ask. If it is in my head, I will feel pretty silly. The doctor will think I am an attention seeker. Don't want that.

As I held onto the bars (hands above head) and the laser positioned itself, for the first time, I was having reservations about doing this to my body. Would you like your breast tissue burnt? Yes, please. What was I thinking? Shall we strap you down? No thanks, I'll willingly sit still for it to happen. Is this the right thing to do? Anyway, the fact remains that as I received my treatment (although not so much today) I was wondering whether I really wanted to be burnt. Too late. I've received it. It is burning the cancer. Move on. But...

I have now completed Day 2 of my Whole30. So, the rules are, for thirty-days, no sugar, gluten, legumes, dairy or grains. This basically means nothing processed. We've been doing this as a family for eight months. We are loving the results and intend to maintain this way of eating for the rest of our lives. Here's what the family (including two children) ate today:

Breakfast: Pancakes

Snack: Coconut Bark

Lunch: Omelette

Dinner: Rissoles and veggies

I'm looking forward to tomorrow. I don't mind having to drive to the hospital. It's too early to be complaining about the half hour trip. And, since the rads aren't going to be too different, (I don't think), from day to day, I might actually get to share about other stuff: the novel I am in the process of writing, being a paleo family, how I ate away cancer and raising children. See ya!