Speech!

Dec 2020...because I like this photo

In 1985, I was the youngest person, at the PAH, to have an appendectomy.  I had just turned five. Only days later, after discharge however, I was back. Green goo oozed from the wound. I had peritonitis. As the admission was around Christmas time, I recall making Christmas craft. I don’t know how accurate my memory is, but I feel like I had a bed not too far from a window that overlooked brightly lit buildings. My initial physical examination, to determine the diagnosis has stayed with me. It scarred me. Seriously. The rest of the experience had been positive but it didn't matter. The damage was done. I was now scared of hospitals. To this day, the smell of hospital grade disinfectant hits hard when I walk through the automatic sliding doors; it doesn’t matter whether I am the visitor or the patient. It makes me so nervous. So, years later, when I’ve had other surgeries, I have always welcomed visitors. I can’t think of anything worse than being alone in a hospital bed!

I have another claim to fame. In February 2021, I was the patient with the most visitors. A lovely man, an ex teacher actually, was making up my bed in the room when he told me that I was the “Star of the Ward”. I thought it must have been my great recovery. But, I was given this title because I had the most visitors. So today, I want to do a shout out to all of those wonderful, caring, loving and generous individuals who have supported me along the way. My grandad always says that, “There’s no such thing as a free lunch” and my “Lady of Leisure” status, I understand, comes at a cost to others. 

My diagnosis ten years ago, brought out such generosity towards me. I found it quite overwhelming. I had lots of family help and I do realise that family support is not always a given. Friends came out of every corner, some who I hadn’t even been in contact with for some time. I couldn’t believe it. Strangers showed kindness to me. I recall the first time I had my head shaved when a random customer at the hairdresser shared my pain in losing my hair. I think of the TBC’s, the group of women who supported me and made me actually excited to go to chemo sessions because I knew that I would see them. I remember chatting with the TBC’s, at 3am in the morning, sharing side effects, because that’s what you do when you have steroids pulsing through your veins. 

Now, I have received messages, letters, cards, phone calls, visits, FaceTime sessions, pictures, gifts, activity packs, meals, house cleans, outings…I hope I haven’t left anything out. Well, I think you get my point. I have to say, and I’m sorry, that I haven’t always replied in a timely manner. Even so, I have really appreciated the big and the little things people have done for me and my family this past nearly two years. Cancer/chemo fatigue is debilitating. There are times when I am too tired to think, to say a sentence and of course too tired to do the everyday things that make us feel like a contributing human being.  

May 2021

 
I can’t remember the specific circumstances, but years ago I mentioned to my uncle that I didn’t know what to say to someone who was going through a rough time. And, for that reason, I had said I wasn’t going to say or do anything. And what he said stuck with me. He told me three things, not in these words, but certainly it was his message. You should say something. You need to acknowledge what is happening to them. You need to let them know that you are there. So I did. 

Thank you so much to those those who have said and done something, for acknowledging what is happening and for letting me know that you are there. It means so much. My latest claim to fame? I have the best support network anyone could ask for! 

MEDICAL REGIME (Third line of treatment)
The second line of treatment, shared on my previous post, stopped working after  around three months. I don’t know if it ever worked. The painful side effects weren’t worth it anyway. I was absolutely devastated that I needed a change in treatment. I opted for the oral chemo because at that time I had insisted that I wouldn’t do IV. I started this in the last quarter of 2020. 

Denosumab: A monthly injection to strengthen bones
Capecitabine: Oral chemo - every day for three weeks followed by a week’s break

My Theme Song

Victoria Falls, Zimbabwe in 1998

There’s a song that has followed me. In fact, music has always been a wonderful escape for me. Not saying that I have lived a life where I needed to escape, perhaps I worded that wrong. When I go for a run (well, it’s been nearly two years since I’ve done that on a Sunday afternoon), I stomp the beat on the pavement and stop thinking. I just listen to the instruments, sometimes the words, the catchy tune and relax. I like to think that there’s a soundtrack to my life. A particular song can throw me back to a holiday once had, a sad or fond memory or just reinforce a mood. Either way, music does affect me. 

In high school, my music class loved to sing together. I don’t remember how it came about. We were a group of teens with different levels of music experience and certainly weren’t all solo vocal artists. But together, we sang beautifully. We received an award for it so, it’s not just my word. Anyway, there’s this song we used to sing. 

Beyond school, I can’t say I heard the song all that often but I did come across the lyrics. When I did hear or read those lyrics, I was instantly thrown back in time to those moments where we sang together. When my children began school, at the very same school that I attended, I was warmed to hear that this song, that our music class sang, had become part of the school culture. So, this song, it seemed to follow me. 

Armed with a diagnosis, medical treatment in hand and my lung clear of fluid, I was happy to be going home after a three night stay at the hospital. At that time, I was very weak. I was tired and in pain. Having had cancer return I knew what was before me. By this time I had followed the treatment of three friends who had their cancer return. I knew how this would end for me. This wasn’t how I had planned to avoid going grey and having wrinkles. I wasn’t going to crossfit my way through this one. This really rattled me. I had already decided that I wasn’t going to do IV chemo so I knew that the statistics that the oncologist rattled off hadn’t factored that. There were two ways in which way this story would end; I would have a miracle or each of the treatments would give me an extended period of stable disease. I had a chronic disease but there was treatment. I should have been ok with it all. I wasn’t though. I was very unsettled. Being unsettled is how I lost my voice.

It was funny how so many people around me started saying exactly what I needed. Basically, I did not have any peace. Funnily, and I don’t believe they were coincidences, so many people around me kept on saying the word. I was even gifted a bottle of “Peace” essential oil. Then an old friend, totally randomly, sent me a song. It was a version of a song sung by Zimbabweans. He had no idea of my circumstances and how greatly I was impacted by this simple sharing of a youtube video. He sent me this song because he remembered that I had travelled to Zimbabwe many years ago. Little did he know that it was a song that had become quite special to me. 

Then, if I couldn’t be pointed towards this song any more strongly in my life, the song popped up at another time. At the beginning of 2020, I had become short of breath. When I would be on my back, I could hear, what I can only describe as, gurgling at the back of my throat. I had been handling the oral chemo well and felt reasonable good so I wondered whether I may have picked up some kind of infection. It was at this time that I was due for a bone and CT scan. Well, it wasn’t so much a surprise when I saw 75% of my lung shaded in - it was full of fluid (for the second time). Within a week, I found myself checking into the hospital for pleura effusion treatment. On completion of the paperwork and before being changed into the uncomfortable underclothes, gown and red socks, I was ushered into a room for blood collection. A blood draw is no easy task with my damaged veins and nerves. But, as the collector knelt down to clean my skin in preparation for the prick of the needle, the introduction to a song was blasted through the ward. You won’t believe the song. Just minutes prior, the collector had told me that a surgeon was setting up to sing. Apparently, he randomly turns up in wards throughout the hospital to sing a song. You know, he could have belted out any song. As my blood slowly collected in the barrel of the syringe, he sang MY SONG!

I have included the version of the song my friend sent me, here for you. I pray that you would have peace too. 

If viewing from a mobile device, you may need to switch to the web version for the video to play. Click on "Web Version" at the bottom of this post.

MEDICAL REGIME 

The first line of treatment, shared on my previous post, stopped working after six months. What this means is that the cancer has become resistant to treatment and the treatment is no longer working. At this point the cancer is able to progress and it did. This was very disappointing. This treatment had the potential to keep things stable for years. It wasn’t to be. 

SECOND LINE OF TREATMENT

Zolodex: A monthly implant to stop ovaries from functioning

Denosumab: A monthly injection to strengthen bones

Affinitor: Oral chemo

Exemestane: Aromatase inhibitor 

A gift from mum

Everyone remembers their favourite teacher. We also remember the teacher we really didn’t like. Some of us may even have words (positive or negative) that were spoken to us by a teacher that we never forgot. If it was negative, I’m sorry that this happened to you. I tried my best to make a difference. Maybe this point isn’t always made clear enough to students and parents - teachers really do care. Anyway, that’s not my point here. 

I have said this to say that I never really thought that I would have a student whose life would impact me. Just after my diagnosis in 2019, I attended the funeral of a student that I had taught. Of course, it was very upsetting. The passing of a young person is always heartbreaking. But, I can tell you right now that I think of that student often. I think of their strength, their courage, their positive attitude, their determination. And, when I’ve felt down, or had to undergo a painful procedure, I think of that student. You won’t believe how I can give myself a kick up the butt and get on with things after those thoughts. Hand on my heart, in June/July 2020, when I believed that my time may be up, I was consoled by the fact that I would meet that student again. Truly. Right now though, a year later, I’m not ready for this to be over.                                                                                                                                                                                                                        
I’d like to go back in time. I want to share what happened in the lead up to allowing poison to be injected into my veins.

In hindsight, I can see there were signs of my illness months before. Some days I would get home and sit in the car in silence because I was just too tired to get out. One day, I drove myself directly to the medical centre, after work, because I had been experiencing chest pain most of the day. I sat in the car park at the medical centre almost convinced that I was about to have a heart attack. The pain was so intense that breathing was causing pain in my chest. There are heart issues in my family so it wasn’t completely an overreaction on my part. I was diagnosed with costochondritis. It was nothing to be worried about. I had neck pain and back pain which the physiotherapist just didn’t seem to be able to help with. I requested a different physiotherapist but that change didn’t help either. He diagnosed me with “non-determined neck pain”. I had been doing judo (haha, correction, trying to do judo) for a few years by now and did think maybe all the throwing around was just taking its toll on my body. Argh, I can’t believe I hadn’t broken a bone!

Our trip to America in 2019, was cut short by a week when we flew back early because I wasn’t well. The feeling of relief when the plane touched down…I can’t even explain! I’m sure you know that feeling of being home, finally. I was unwell for a further 7 weeks before I was eventually told by a choked-up, young, female doctor, in ER, after having had a CT scan, of my diagnosis. I remember just thinking to myself, “This is how it ends”.  When you enter the Breast Cancer Club you make friends with people who have cancer. This is a great thing. It just sucks when you see their cancer return, the treatments they endure and then their passing - it then becomes the worst thing to have friends with breast cancer. I realise this may seem to be a cold comment but you know what I mean. And remember, I did say I would be honest. My thoughts aren’t always rainbows and unicorns as some may think!

With the diagnosis written on my medical file, I was checked in to the hospital for a stay. There I would have 400 ml of fluid drained from the lining of my lung. I would also start treatment. I had many visitors. They had sad faces of course. Some cried. Let’s be real, when cancer comes back, there’s an unspoken truth. Everyone is thinking it, “She doesn’t have long”. Please don’t deny this, I thought it too. Everyone says these wonderful words but underneath…c’mon seriously?!

That first night in hospital, I listened on repeat to a song my SIL sent me, “Take Courage”. I can’t really listen to it now because it reminds me of that night. But, I let the words sink in and tried to speak myself into getting on a unicorn and riding into a rainbow. 

The following morning, before the sun was up, I was awoken by the blood collector. I cried when she told me she was there to take may blood. She cried right back. It was so nice later that day when she popped in to see how I was. At that minute, I was with the husband and we were laughing about something. She said that she was glad to see me happy. Either that day or the next, a nurse asked if she could pray for me. That was nice. All these little things, I kept in my heart. And, when I felt down, I remembered the kind people around me. 

Something I also try to remember is that everyone has some challenge to overcome. It may be divorce, death, disease, abuse, disability, ill health, loss, conflict or estrangement. I don’t want to cheapen this with the saying, “be kind, everyone is fighting some kind of battle”, but have we ever really thought about what that really means?

A number of people have lessened the challenge that they are facing because it can’t be worse than my challenge. Cancer wins every time right? No way. I know some challenges that people face and I’lll take cancer. Honestly. So please, don’t feel sorry for me. I want to share my thoughts with you because I want you to know that we can gain strength from each other. Having said all that, I’d be happy to hand my challenge right back hahaha Where’s my #livingmybestlife? It did also appear that some people were showing off their good health too much sometimes. But yeah, Regina Brett got it right when she said, "If we threw our problems in a pile and saw everyone else's, we'd grab ours back". I'll take mine. You must take yours. 

I'm an office fan and I thought of this scene. I think David was trying to quote Brett. 

(NB: You will need to click on "View Web Version" at the bottom of the post to view the video.)

I also acknowledge that the challenges that we face are meant to help us to help those around us. I love the stories of people who overcome adversity and then put themselves right back there to pull others up. 

So today, I draw strength from God foremost. I draw strength from those who I have known and from those who walk with me now. I also draw strength in knowing I have a future and a purpose. 

And so that nothing is a waste, I sincerely pray that you may draw some strength from me xx

MEDICAL REGIME (First line of treatment)
Zolodex: A monthly injection to stop ovaries from functioning
Denosumab: A monthly injection to strengthen bones
Kisquali: Oral chemo
Femara: Aromatase inhibitor 

I WANT TO BELIEVE

I read “Fitzherbert Frog loses his voice” so many times to my children. I had just about memorised the story and it’s likely that I enjoyed telling the story more than they enjoyed hearing it. All those years ago, reading that story, I never imagined that one day I would have something in common with the fluoro green frog. Just like him though, I eventually found my voice. 

I took a quick, deep breath and yelled, “Scully!” from an upper level of Indooroopilly Shopping Centre. It was 1995 (I think) and I stood alongside hundreds of X-Files fans wanting a glimpse of Scu…I mean…Gillian Anderson. The blurry photo of a tiny Anderson stood as my evidence for the encounter. Please, I want to emphasise, I’m not the person who lauds movie stars but, this show, X-Files is the exception.

X-Files has, and this is why we should be careful what our kids watch, made a significant impact on my thinking. Thinking that has carried into adulthood.  As a teen viewer, I very quickly decided that I could relate to the “Trust No One”, “I want to Believe” phrases and yeah, for sure, the government was an establishment to be questioned. Side note - I had a great childhood and I wasn’t bullied at school. It was just that the storylines in this cult show really exposed some truths. Well, I believed them to be truths. The result? I learned to love a good conspiracy. 

I found particular episodes so intriguing that I would spend time at the local library (no internet back then) looking for further information. So much so, that in my Computer Studies class, I demonstrated my skill at excel spreadsheets (an assignment task) to lay out UFO sightings and related info. I just gobbled this stuff up, I loved it. What if there were monsters in the sewers of New York, crop circles in the countryside of England, government departments deploying men wearing all black, erasing memories and alien abductions were for real? 

I didn’t have anyone to share this information with who didn’t think I was a little weird. But, so many times, I was conflicted. How could one even contemplate such things having been brought up in a home with the sacred Christian text at the centre? I believe that Jesus died on the cross and rose again so that I may have eternal life, and still do, but how would I reconcile this? Perhaps only one truth could exist? Yes, seriously, I did believe that there were truths to the sci-fi classic. Again, this was something that I was interested in exploring but it was a weird topic that others weren’t interested in. So, I kept these thoughts to myself. 

In 2011, when I was diagnosed with breast cancer I had already formed strong opinions on big Pharma, thanks to the influence of my fav TV show. Chemo was one “hellova drug”. It was founded upon chemicals used against enemies in war. Why on earth would I have this injected into my blood stream, willingly? I was so conflicted. My conspiracy theories rose to the surface influencing, heavily, my decision on treatment for the disease. Do I take the poison? There was something else to consider… Couldn’t the God who created the universe just heal me miraculously? 

Well, truth is, I didn’t get a miracle. And, after investigating alternatives, I went with the mainstream recommendation - cut, poison and burn i.e. surgery, chemo and radiation. Having discarded the food pyramid and choosing to eat whole foods I found that to be a way to have some control in this seemingly out-of-my-control situation. The poison, which I so reluctantly took, did its job. I was cancer free or some might say, in remission. I had to admit that big Pharma did as it had promised. So was I wrong to have questioned them and have bought into the conspiracies? I can say that I did confirm, for myself, my theory that eating a whole food diet was the best way to heal. Before, during and after I found that my faith had indeed helped me to get though. I thanked God for strength and for giving me so many blessings along the way. I yelled these truths to whoever would listen, in the form of a blog, “Out Came the Sunshine”.  Chemo could be done, healthy eating is the way to go and believing the former two doesn’t mean that you don’t believe in God. 

Nine years later however, August 2019, I lost my voice. I was diagnosed with breast cancer again. 

So, big phama didn’t do it’s job after all. Eating healthy also seemed to have failed me. I still had my faith. Some might call me crazy but I wasn’t about to start blaming God or anything. 

This time it was not in my breast. It was in my bones, too many to require itemisation. It was in my liver. It was in my lung. I stopped working a job that I gained so much joy in. The house renovations were cancelled. I was unable to run my house. Being a wife and mother came in equal second place to the disease. I sat at home. I tried really hard to make sense of the cancer coming back. I had so many questions. Why was this happening? What am I supposed to learn? How can I be a productive citizen at this time? What’s my purpose? What had I done to bring this upon myself? Honestly though, I just wanted it to be over - I didn’t care how. 

I tried to access my old blog, thinking that I’d blog my experiences again, like I had all those years ago. I found it so helpful and I remember my readers did too. But, I couldn’t work out how to access the site. I created a new one, using a different platform and titled it, “I Choose Yellow”. I took my oldest daughter on a walk, camera in hand, to capture something yellow. This blog was going to document how positive I was despite the circumstance. It was like I had found purpose - my voice was under a rock and I was about to get it back. But my voice wasn’t there. I couldn’t lie. I wasn’t feeling positive. I was bending and bowing with the wind as it tossed me from thoughts of death to life, back and forth. I socialised when I felt reasonable and those around me commented on how positive I was. Truth is, it’s not how I felt on the inside. It’s easy to be positive when you’re feeling ok; quite a different thing when you're in pain or feeling yuck. I just couldn’t think of anything to write. Nothing. What’s more, there were things about this recent diagnosis and treatment that I didn’t want anyone to know. And, my rule of writing a blog is that I would be honest. This time I couldn’t be honest. I didn’t want to share it all. My voice was no where to be found. 

Last time, cancer was a physical battle. This time, it’s a mental one. How do you explain that?

Well, on Aprll 9, 2021, just days away from starting IV chemo, I found my voice. So, here I am. It’s day 1 of IV chemo. I’m ready to talk. (And, somehow, I managed to get my old blog alive again.) 

In memory of a TBC

This week one of the TBCs passed away. She fought a mighty battle right until the end. Her memory will live on.

I do not presume to know my TBC better than any other. I do not presume that I can grasp the weight so heavy on those closest to her. One thing I can be sure of is that this TBC would want others to learn more about Infammatory Breast Cancer (IBC). Out of the TBCs, she was the only one who had this particular breast cancer.

I quickly recall her telling her cancer story. For her, her battle began when she fought for doctors to acknowledge that something sinister was in her body. I recall her frustration. I recall her anger. Certainly, googling cannot replace the need for professional advice. But, surely we can all agree, that sometimes we do need to take our health into our own hands!

Don't get me wrong, I do respect our advances in medicine. But, our doctors are not perfect. Sometimes they do get it wrong. This TBC can be admired for her persistance to fight; even in the early days.

So, for her, I take this opportunity to plead with you to get to know about Inflammatory Breast Cancer. Please have a conversation with someone about it. It's important.

With that been said, there is far more to this TBC than cancer. It is with mixed emotions that I await the opportunity to say goodbye and join in celebration of her life early next week.

As I dance around the lounge with my pink and purple mates (and the blue one), I think of this Tough Beautiful Chick. It is a priviledge to be here, in this moment. In her honour, I will try my best to appreciate each and every moment.

     "Know the true value of time; snatch, seize, and enjoy every moment of it. No idleness, no delay, no procrastination; never put off till tomorrow what you can do today"
                                                                   - Earl of Chesterfield

A Tribute

It was quite sometime ago that I gained the permission of my chemo buddies to write about them and include a photograph. And, while I admit that I have been totally slack in keeping you up-to-date, I have to also admit that without cancer, my life has gotten very busy again. I'm not sure if that's entirely good...but it's the truth of the matter.

What follows is how I met my cancer buddies. The Tough Bald Chicks. The TBCs.

The first TBC was a friend. When her story of having an operation hit facebook I didn't realise that it was cancer related. I certainly didn't expect to be a few steps behind her. So, via facebook, I shared my diagnosis with her. It was also her who gave me parking tips, prepared me for the large crowd of women at the Breast Clinic and who gave me the warmest of hugs on the morning I was to meet with the team who would operate to remove my cancerous tumour. I am so grateful to have had her alongside me. I even smile to myself when I think of the late night chats we had, sharing our weird and wonderful side effects, because the steroid medication would not allow us to sleep. Thank you, you are an inspiration.

It was this very same TBC, I introduced above, who shared the story of another women who was going through cancer treatment. So, one afternoon , I met her in Breast Clinic. Breast Clinic, it's the place to make friends apparently...

This tall women dressed in colours bounded up to the scales. (Have I ever mentioned that you get weighed in for each chemo session so that they can be sure that they are giving you the right amount of drugs to kill all of your healthy cells but not necessasily you?) She had laughed with the nurse and then bounded back to her seat. It's strange that I recall such detail, two years on, but the truth of the matter is she impacted me. I was amazed at her jovial banter and certainly inspired by this women who hid her bald head beneathe a scarf.  Later, she would share her fears about cancer (we all had those) and yet, her will to fight was so inspiring. Thank you, you are an inspiriation.

I first caught eye of this next TBC in the Breast Clinic. Did I already mention that Breast Clinic is where you make friends? She was beautiful. I thought cancer patients were grey and unsmiling. Well, she broke the mold that I held of cancer patients, that's for sure. She wore a strategically placed trendy hat, so as to hide her loss of hair. What stood out for me though was this woman's great big smile and her contagious laughter. She hadn't just been having a good day either. No matter her circumstances she has always shown an unrelenting desire to laugh cancer in its face. Thank you, you are an inspiration.

When I first sat in that chemo chair, I was close to another women who would later become a TBC. I certianly felt to be the drab one at the chemo lounge. Is it weird that I remember such detail...She had the best wig, very natural, and I remember admiring her boots. Again, I was overwhelemed with the couragious attitude of a cancer paitient and hoped that some of that would rub onto me. This TBC has gone to incredible lengths to promote breast cancer awareness and has sacrificed much of her time to raise funds for cancer research. Wow! Keep up the good work. Thank you, you are an inspiration.

I have to admit that, it wasn't the women who would become a TBC that I noticed first, in this instance. It was her daughter. I'll admit it, I loved her beautiful, long hair and with my hair gone I was certainly having a little hair-envy.  For a couple of chemo sessions, I would see a mother with her daughter sitting by her side. It would certainly take a courageous young woman to sit by their mum in the chemo lounge. But, she did it. She is certianly a testament to her parents. And so, when I finally, officially met this next TBC, I wasn't surprised to find a kind, warm-hearted caring and certianly courageous women. She has always offerend such gentle words of encouragement. Thank you, you are an inspiration.

Then I met the funniest of the TBCs. When I sat next to this TBC, the time went by so fast that I may even go as far as to say that it was my best chemo session ever. To this TBC, thank you for the laughs. You have shown so much courage and strength. And, through it all you have maintained a postive outlook. How do you do it? Thank you, you are an inspiration.

Thank you TBCs. You are always in my heart xxxxx

On the edge

In the last couple of weeks, I have made some decisions with regard to my fight against cancer. I have begun oil-pulling, introduced lemon and water to my morning, am confidently sculling apple cider vinegar and water in the afternoons and drinking bone broth as often as I can. There is a method to this absolute madness. 

I guess I should begin with the strangest thing of all, oil-pulling. This is the act of swishing (oh man, this sounds even worse when I try to explain it) coconut oil in your mouth, first thing in the morning, for 10-15 mins. The first time I did it, I gagged until I had to race to the bathroom sink and spit out the chunks of coconut. I was so disappointed in myself. But then, thanks to the internet, I found myself among many others who did the same the first time they tried the practice. Many said that the gagging disappeared by the third round. And so, it was true. I was able to crunch away at the solidified oil, the third time, without gagging. I swish before anyone else, in the house, is awake. I have a shower and get a few things done in order to get my mind off what I am actually doing, pushing the oil through my teeth over and over. I do this because I want to have better teeth. Even though I have always looked after my teeth, it seems that I was doomed to have trouble. All my back teeth are filled, I've had a few root canals and even as I type this I am aware of some more work that I need done. So, not only will my teeth supposedly get whiter but I should be able to eliminate some of the nasty bacteria that hangs about and creates plaque. I had read a few articles about oil-pulling but was finally convinced when I discovered just how many women found themselves with breast cancer not long after having had root canal. I would absolutely recommend you check it out. It's crazy. I am not keen, at all, to be having any major work on my teeth now; and I figure that I should at least give this a go. As you can imagine there are some pretty skeptical people out there. But, I'm going to do it for a while and see if I notice a difference in the coming months. 

After I've rinsed my mouth from the oil-pulling, I then head straight to the kitchen to drink the juice of half a lemon in a glass of water. This is to increase my body's pH. Apparently, cancer cells cannot survive in an alkaline environment. In order to achieve this, it is recommended that one should eat less meat and more soy products. I am not interested in lowering my meat consumption because I feel convicted that I am doing the right thing there; but, soy? Considering my cancer was oestrogen respondent, I really don't like the idea of ingesting something that mimics oestrogen. So, I have found two other ways in which I can raise my pH. I've already shared the first. The second, which I drink in the afternoon, is a tablespoon of unpasturised apple cider vinegar in a glass of water. I do not sit back and relax with a glass of either of these. I take it because I believe it's good for me. And, that's that. At some point, I would like to test my pH. I just haven't got around to that yet. I will mention though that the same week that I began this that I found myself really energised. I have no idea whether this was a coincidence or not. Actually, I have been trying to convince the husband to give it a go to see if he notices anything. 

Finally, bone broth. Last time, I made bone broth I was too disgusted at the thought of drinking it by itself that I resorted to using it as a stock in my cooking. This is quite ok. But, I realise that I can do better than that. I'm also going to give this a real good go. For a few months, I am going to try and drink a cup of this stuff a day. No one will deny the amazing benefits of bone broth. This mineral-rich liquid is just darn good for you. But, I have also found a few sites that reckon it makes you look younger, that it can get rid of your cellulite(!!!!) and so much more. 

Don't take my word for it though. I absolutely encourage you to check out these three practices. Whether you have had cancer or not, you never know what good health is waiting for you.

Let me know how you go.

I eat fermented cabbage

When we cut out dairy, sadly it also meant that the good stuff in yogurt, the intestines-friendly bacterial cultures were cut out too. This was a concern. 


I soon discovered that there was this Polish recipe, sauerkraut, that had the healthy flora that was missing from our diet. I purchased bottled sauerkraut. The whole family found it tolerable but, I knew that I would have to eventually make my own.  There is one serious drawback though. Sauerkraut is fermented cabbage. Think about that for a minute or two. Do you think that you could swallow a forkfull of homemade cabbage that had fermented? I didn't mind the stuff when it came from the store. But, what would mine taste like? There were so many on-line people that pushed how easy the stuff was to make that I eventually took the plunge. 


The recipe from Balanced Bites just seemed too good to be true. I followed the directions. I placed my bottled cabbage on the kitchen bench for two weeks. I waited anxiously. Actually, I couldn't wait for the full 14 days. Today, marked day 13 and I was desperately keen to taste the fermented goods. Well, sort of keen. What was it going to taste like?


The whole family had a taste. It was pretty good. I could not stop smiling at my glass bottle of good bacteria. Anyway, tonight, I also found out that the good stuff in sauerkraut has been shown to be a wonderful preventative for breast cancer! This has made my night. Not only do we now have an easy little recipe that will see the reintroduction of healthy bacteria in our bellies, but it's another cancer fighter. It's a new way that I can actively prevent cancer recurrence for me and it ever touching my children. 


The next item on my "To do" list is bone broth. I'll keep you posted. 

Do kids need dairy?

When the husband brought home the idea of us eating, "paleo", I was quickly convinced of the benefits of eating clean. That was until he mentioned that changing our foodstyle also meant eliminating all dairy. As a mother of two small children, I was very reluctant to be going down that path. The food pyramid came to mind, so did thirty-plus years of images of children drinking milk on advertisements to toughen their teeth and bones, and the thought of another food group leaving our house was all just too much. I was happy to give-up the grains, sugar, chemicals, legumes, pasta and rice, but milk was always going to have its place in my fridge.

Well, as you already know, I was eventually convinced of the evils of dairy. After reading Robb Wolf's The Paleo Solution and then a search around the internet, I saw that it wasn't necessarily dairy that child one and two required, rather, they needed to be getting calcium. And, surprisingly, they could actually absorb more calcium into their little bodies if we ditched the dairy and concentrated on calcium-rich vegetables. And besides, I was interested to see the children's reaction, and mine, to dairy once we reintroduced it after going without it for 30 days. 

But before I share the reaction to dairy once it was reintroduced, I'd like to share with you three very simple arguments that convinced me to eliminate dairy for 30 days initially. First of all, it has been found that dairy actually provokes an inflammatory response in the gut when consumed; this is no good. Secondly, consuming milk spikes insulin levels; this is no good. And finally, there seemed to be enough evidence that allergies disappeared with dairy; this is good. We had nothing to lose (perhaps a lower calcium count for 30 days at the worst), so I figured it was worth doing. Oh, and there's also the argument that cow's milk is for their babies, and not for humans. That's an interesting argument too. 

When the 30 days were over (actually I think we went longer than 30 days because we all felt so amazing) we treated ourselves to ice-cream. Aside from a sore belly that night, from the sugar, it seemed like the treat was fairly well handled. The next morning however, brought some interesting news. While child two showed no side effects from the indulgence (typical), child number one could be heard sniffing and sneezing in the early hours of the morning. The husband had the same. Coincidence? Did they have a bug the night before that only presented itself the next morning? I was happy to shrug that first incident off. But, since then, time and time again, both child one and the husband suffer with "hay fever" the morning after having dairy. It's pretty unbeleiable. It's a guarantee.

So to answer the question, "Do kids need dairy?" I would have to say no way. Children definitely need calcium. And from now on, their daily calcium intake will come from sources other than dairy. And, I'm absolutely satisfied with that. 

Treating cancer after treatment

Ok, so I lied. I am still somewhat under treatment. I am now six months into my five-year hormone treatment of tamoxifen. Thankfully, I have experienced only one side effect. It's a little embarrassing... My side burns are growing a little more hair than they should. It's not enough to warrant a shave or hair removal cream, but it's there. Oh well. No big deal, really. It's a good thing though because it's a sign, for me at least, that my oestrogen, which was feeding the cancer, is lower.

The tamoxifen is the official treatment. I thought I'd share though the other changes that I have made since going paleo and then going cancer-fighting-mode once discovering I had breast cancer.

This time last year, I was fighting the urge to check that my tumour hadn't gotten any bigger, I was looking into the mirror at the tumourous lump wishing that April 29 (lumpectomy date) would come quicker. I was also eating meat cooked rare, raw, organic vegetables and a diet that was high in fat and low in carbs. My very diligent husband was reading up on as much as he could about ways various individuals fought cancer naturally. Most of these people were in a position where they were not able to access medical treatment. And so, they were forced to do something on their own. For many, many people, cancer disappeared. It didn't come back either. I wasn't confident enough with all of that so I did what they did plus what the doctors recommended. Do I have regrets?

Well, I absolutely believe that I made the best decision with the information that I had at the time. I have a strong feeling though that years down the track I may have wished that I had not allowed the...mmm I have forgotten the two drugs... cyclophosphamide and taxotere into my system. I have freaked myself out a little with my googling of chemotherapy side effects; all of which I was aware of, but now they seem more real. Particularly when, I forget words, can't remember conversations that I have had, stop mid sentence because I have no idea what I was talking about, make commitments and forget about them and then just general vagueness. So, I get that this happens to the best of us. I get that this did happen to me before. But, it's a little too often. And the fact that other cancer survivors tell me that this is what they are experiencing led me to think about including foods that will help. Yep, food can help.

For the past few weeks we have deviated a little...gasp...from our paleo extremism. Our family indulged in a gluten-free pizza (it was funny to see child number two eat this because eating a triangle was a new experiene), chocolates over easter and an ice-cream or two. We even ate a gluten-free naan! Each treat tasted beautiful. But within minutes of them hitting our belly we knew it wasn't worth it. It was during such crazy behaviour that I broke a tooth! I couldn't believe it. But there it is. Another chemo side effect. Chemotherapy weakens your teeth. I don't have the best of teeth anyway, so to know that my teeth are weaker is not good.

I want to be healthy and strong. I want to be able to stop cancer with me. I want to reverse the side effects of chemotherapy. I want to turn my world upside down because ultimately, I don't know what it was in my body that allowed the growth to occur in the first place. So, what follows are some of the ways that I believe I can fight any future cancerours events. I am certainly not stopping here. But, I am making the changes slowly.

Well, you are already aware of my food lifestyle. Aside from booked in events I am gluten, sugar, legume, dairy and grain free. I prepare all of my food from scratch and spend hardly any money at the local supermarket. Rather, I make regular trips to my local butcher and organic farmer.

I have decided to slip in and out of a ketogenic diet. This is not how I eat all of the time. Every now and then I decide to do it for a few weeks. It's simply eating very low carbs. It puts your body in a ketogenic state and it has been proven to be a way in which to fight cancer. The state is not good to be in over long periods of time. For this reason, I dabble in this treatment.

I have elimiated chemicals in my laundry and now use a homemade laundry powder. It doesn't make the whites whiter or the colours brighter. It does clean them though. The pay off is that I am not wearing clothing that has chemicals sitting in the fibres. Am I a little paranoid?

This has been a tough one. Because a change in deodorant, or going without actually effects others. I was using a homemade "deodorant" but found that it wasn't cutting it. I am now going with the Moo Goo brand. It's alright. I also don't mind the edible (for real!) dedorants. They tend to need to be applied again in the day. But, again, using these products means that I am not dosing my skin with chemicals.

Our carpet was cleaned with natural products. This was a complete accident. It just happened to be the choice of the local business that we happened to employ for the job over the last two years. They did a great job with our carpets and I would definietly recommend looking for a company that will clean your carpets with completely natural products.

Another simple change has been in our soap. Honestly, in the past, I have always simply opted for the cheap stuff. Now, I'm looking for the natural soaps. They do smell really nice too.

Ok, so I might cop a bit of flack for this one. But, I'm sticking to it. Unless, I'm going to be in the sun for an extended amount of time (the whole day) I am not wearing sunscreen! The first reason is the amount of chemicals: that's a big turn off. But the other thing that I will miss out on is the vitamin D. Every day, I look to spend, at least, a half an hour in the sun without protection. Chemotherapy lowers vitamin D levels, I need it for my bones and let's face it we all feel so much better after being outdoors.

I am finding this one difficult but I do aim to have eight hours sleep each night. This is a way in which I can limit stress; who needs any more of that?

We all know that exercise is good for us. It's great for fighting cancer too. I avoid regimes that place too much stress on the body and opt for short workouts, nothing longer than 20 minutes and certainly only one session a day. I'd like to be doing this six days a week but as I still fight some of the fatigue (yep) I sometimes do less than I would like.

But that's a key too isn't it? Being sensitive to your own body; knowing when to rest, when to say no to a workout and just having a nap. When I can, I take a nap. And, I never feel guilty or lazy about it.

As a mother of a 2 and 4 year old there are plenty of opportunies for play. This is another way that I can be treating cancer. It relieves stress, it's fun and certainly builds loving bonds.

Finally, and perhaps my lastest addition to my treating cancer after treatment is fasting. There is some serious evidence that fasting is fantastic in keeping away cancer. A few weeks ago, I was skipping breakfast. I have now progressed to skipping two meals a day. So, I know what you're thinking. I have some serious food issues. Not true. Let me finish. If I fast I have to be eating well. In fact, if my insulin levels are doing well I will actually find that I am not craving food. And this has certainly been the case. I have been quite surprised at how I have been able to skip two meals. I assure you that I am not doing this to lose weight. It is purely medicinal. The fasting state is good for your body. Currently, I fast two meals, twice a week. I would love to be able to swap one for a 24 hour fast, but my head just isn't there yet.

Today's post, was accidentally a little longer than I had planned. And, as I read over it perhaps a little disjointed. I hope that I have included all of the ways that I am fighting cancer from returning. There is no doubt room for more ways in which I can fight cancer on a daily basis. And, a year from now, I bet I'll have quite a few more items to add to my list. I don't want a reoccurrence of 2011 and I don't want my children to face cancer. We're going to do everything different. At the age of 30 my body was prime for cancer. Now, as I approach 32 (cringe), there is no room for the c-word.

Take that, cancer!

Food Diary - Day 7

The final entry for my food diary. Well, this week has not been necessarily the best one to show off. I didn't get to include lamb rissoles, coconut chicken, mayo and whole lot of other meals that make up our paleo repertoire. I hope, though, that it has provided an insight into how paleo looks for a family of four. As you will have noticed, there's quite a bit of repetition, repetition, repetition. That is the result of bulk meat purchases and keeping the kitchen time as low as is actually possible.

Aside from peach and pecan scramble our hot nutty cereal is the children's next favourite breakfast. We enjoyed that with banana and local honey on top.

Up and until now, we didn't incorporate honey into any area of our cooking. I would cringe when child one and two would have honey. It has taken a year, but I am now ok with child one and two enjoying treats made with honey, honey in their rooibos and on a spoon by itself. The only condition is that it is local honey. Mark Sisson gave me permission to do this. (Check out his link here.)

Bacon, eggs, vegetables and avocado were on our table at lunch. We filled in the time between that meal and the next one doing yard work. We've become pretty insistent that we all get at least thirty minutes of sunlight (without sunscreen) each day (for vitamin D). And, you may have to try it for yourself, but the change in nutrition has meant that our skin doesn't burn like it used to. I am serious! If you are someone who burns easily, try this diet out and see how different your skin is.

The day finished with Thai red chicken curry and raw cabbage on the dinner plate.

Anyway, that's it for the food diary. I wish I had shown a week where we ate 21 different meals. But, the paleo reality is that, for us, we eat a lot of the same things. We love it though!

Food Diary - Day 6

If there is ever a meal that we can eat out more or less successfully it's breakfast. While some question whether bacon is really paleo we tend to make allowances on occasion for it. So, Saturday we sat down, at a local cafe, for breakfast. I have to admit that we ate gluten free toast.

The last time I had gluten free toast (can't think when I last ate "normal" bread) was when I was in the middle of chemo. I remember that there were two instances where all I could imagine eating was bread. And, been convinced of the evils of gluten I went for the gluten free variety. Anyway, the point is we ate the toast. To be honest, both the husband and I were not convinced that we had really been missing out on anything.

It's funny, when we made the foodstyle change there were many times when we felt like we were missing out to not be having grain, sugar or dairy. But, seriously, whenever we eat the forbidden foods we are not impressed at all. I guess we have this romanticised view of these foods now. The reality is, is that we eat beautiful, healthy, filling meals that don't make us bloated. Perhaps that's the biggest turn-off with regard to eating the non-paleo foods. We have been avoiding them for so long now that they now make us sick. Our immunity to such foods has passed. Our bodies have had time to heal and kick up a stink when we shove anything that is unnatural in. The fact is, we ate the gluten free toast but regretted it straight away. We won't do it again.

By accident really, none of us ate lunch. Whoops! Believe me, I would never have my children do a fast. When they get older they may be keen to do what mum and dad do. I would love for child one and two to get onto the fasting wagon (there are so many health benefits, but more on that another time). Truly, it was an accident. We did not eat lunch! It was an involuntary, accidental fast.

For a good part of the afternoon, our lamb leg sat in the barbeque on low. My oven was still out of action and we were feeling for a roast. This was the first time that we had ever done this. The meat was beautiful. We enjoyed roast lamb with vegetables, egg and avocado that was mashed in the lamb roast's juices. Yum!

Food Diary - Day 5

Friday our family began the day with a big breakfast; bacon, eggs, sweet potato, avocado, spinach leaves and tomato. It was beautiful.

I did the standard lunch for child one and two. Sweet potato and coconut chicken for first break and a treat with two fruits for second break. When I don't have fruit I don't mind including some tinned or pureed fruit provided it is 100% fruit. These days, we always read the list of ingredients and it's been an eye opener for me to see how often sugar is added alongside colours and preservatives. We avoid such things.

I took my lunch to work. It was thai red curry with raw cabbage. While I enjoyed it I think I've had a bit too much of this meal... Will give it a rest for a bit.

For dinner the family enjoyed lamb chops, borewors, egg, vegetables and avocado. Three hearty meals made for a great day in paleo dining.

Food Diary - Day 4

I made it to noon! I didn't feel off today either. The trick was to keep busy.

Child one and two requested pumpkin soup for breakfast. I was very pleased with that, because all that I needed to do was warm their dishes of soup in the microwave. What a treat to not have to heat up the fry pan.

Child one was sent to school with the last of the pumpkin soup, a pear, apple puree and a brownie.

Before lunch, child two and I headed to "the farm" for some organic produce. We were lucky enough to get some free range, bug-eating-chicken eggs. Apparently, the less grain chickens are fed and the more bugs they eat the better their eggs are for you. So, for lunch we had lamb curry, (and the following are all from the farm), one fried egg, avocado, cabbage and tomato. It was the best meal ever! You can imagine how much I enjoyed that meal having not eating for 16 hours. I did a few pushpresses and "pullups" (still trying to the master these) just before I broke the fast.

This is where I get a little embarrassed about sharing my paleo food diary with those who may not do this. In fact, if I had to tell my 29 year old self what I would be eating at 31, I would think it was weird. Like, what is wrong with you? But here it is. I gave the children their dinner early (seems to be coming routine...) and was feeling a little peckish as I prepared it. Child number one decided that they only wanted half an egg, so I thought I'd just have the other half. It seemed silly just to eat an egg on its own. Let me tell you about silly. So, to the half fried egg on the plate I added some chilli tuna (an Aldi brand), avocado and tomato. I guess this meal is equivalent to having cheese and tomato crackers; it's quick, easy, not too filling. There. I said it. Paleo peeps may find this meal ok. To others, I get it if you think that perhaps we have just overstepped the mark on this food thing.

A big meal wasn't so necessary tonight, after having had that "snack". I warmed up some roast chicken in the fry pan. And then, fried an egg in the juices. Last week, there were no spinach leaves, at the farm, because flooding had destroyed the crops. This week I bought a decent sized bag. With dairy out the picture, we tend to eat a lot of spinach because it's a good source of calcium. Anyway, that, tomato, capsicum and avocado completed the meal.

The family have not made any complaints about the use of coconut oil in the cooking so it mustn't have an overpowering flavour. Good. Talking about coconut oil...there is some research that suggests that it can reverse or slow down Alzheimer's. I will need to read up a bit more on this. Those of you who have had chemo or know someone who has will understand "chemo brain". Some strange, and scary side effects, of chemotherapy are still being studied by the medical profession. And, one of these is the effect the drugs can have on the patient's memory. Anyway, this video I watched, which freaked me out a little, was saying that chemo can bring on alzheimer's. This is what I'm thinking. First of all, read more about it. Then, try and include foods that will counteract the disease.

Before bed, I'm going to finish the night off with a cup of rooibos tea. The end.

Food Diary - Day 3

Pancake mix was in the fridge. I had made so much batter, yesterday, that I had plenty for pancakes again this morning. I drizzled a little maple syrup on mine and enjoyed it with a long black.

I sent child number one to school with pumpkin soup in their thermo jar, this morning. I hadn't made the pumpkin soup. In fact, I have been told that my version of it is no good (thanks eldest). My mum supplied a rather large glass dish of the orange stuff. It's child number one's favourite. I chopped up some peach and put it in a container. And, purely because I was out of fruit, put some dried fruit in a second container. The mother-in-love provided the treat. It was a

flourless, paleo brownie. It is beautiful. She is being very secretive about the recipe, but it is definitely paleo and, what's more, it's a hit with the kiddies. (I forgot to get a photo...tomorrow?)

As soon as I got to work I found myself reaching for my small

container of almonds and macadamias. Actually, I'm pretty spoilt on Wednesdays because my mother-in-love makes me lunch. I enjoyed ham, eggs and salad.

Ever since Mark Sisson made the claim that dark chocolate (85%) is good for you, about a fortnight ago, we have been munching down the stuff. Previously, we had treated it as a treat. Something that we could eat to

celebrate or to have on our no-so-often cheat

nights. But now, we are enjoying a little everyday. And, what's more, and I'm excited about this, child number one asked for a piece and then some more. See, child number two really doesn't know any other way of eating; so is very compliant with the paleo way. So much so, that this little one loves dark chocolate. We decided that we would ease child number one, who has had a taste of the "good" life, onto the dark stuff by starting with 70%. It didn't take long. That was only a week a

go. And now, we may have two little dark chocolate eaters on our hands. Win! I enjoyed a few (let's be honest, several) pieces of dark chocolate with a cup of rooibos tea.

Because mummy (that's me) gets sick of cooking sometimes, I do tend to do big cook ups that provides meals for a couple of days. Paleo is no easy way out. If you chose to do it, be prepared to give your kitchen a serious workout. Well, I don't mind too much. But, anyway, the children don't complain if we have the same meal for a couple of days. So, it was no surprise that even though child number one had pumpkin soup for lunch, pumpkin soup was also the request for dinner. This made things easy for me. I served up soup for child one and two. And, again, I gave them their dinner early. Now that child one is at school, there is a huge appetite just waiting to be met.

The adults enjoyed chick-veggie heaven with (have a guess) fried eggs. I have to admit, that while we haven't had it for a while, it is a favourite of mine.

That's it. There really is nothing fancy about paleo. There is no magic trick. A lot of cooking that's for sure. But, when the food is good, it's worth all of the fuss in the kitchen.

Recently, I read how fasting has proven to make chemotherapy more effective. I'm sort of glad that I only heard that now. I would have really wanted to have given it a good go. In hindsight I also feel as though it may have just been another thing that I would have to do; and perhaps it would have just all been too much. Anyway. Actually, when one really gets into the paleo way, it is something that should become regular, fasting that is. So, the cancer link and the fact that it's probably the next step for me, got me doing a fast twice a week. I've done this for the past three weeks. For some of those fasts I haven't felt too good. Insulin levels, sleep and nutrition have to be sweet before it can be achieved without the moody behaviour and cloudy (thinking is mostly cloudy these days after having had chemo...) thinking. I didn't do a fast this past Monday, as you would know from my food diary. I will do one tomorrow though. So, I have stopped eating now. I will not eat again until midday. And, just to shake things up (this will give my body the impression that it was a longer fast) I will do a light workout before I eat. I'm looking forward to doing the IF (intermittent fast) tomorrow and I'm keen to see how my body reacts this time.

Wish me luck.

Food Diary - Day 2

I have decided to ditch the macadamia and olive oil for the real stuff. Coconut oil. I have dabbled in its usage but, honestly, it was its price tag that put me off. Well, I read about coconut oil benefits for the 100th time, and that final text convinced me. It has only taken a year... I bought some today from the local health food store and I am looking forward to the change in flavour.

This morning we had a bit of a feast. We had a two course breakfast. The first was peach and pecan scramble and then we followed that with pancakes with maple syrup. I've mentioned both of those breakfasts before, so I didn't grab a photo.

Child number two went to school with basically the same lunch as yesterday. I was so excited when returning from school my little "preppie" exclaimed, "I loved my lunch today".

I had two handfuls of almonds and macadamias before a lunch today of Thai chicken red curry (another one that I've already mentioned somewhere on this blog). I mashed an avocado over the top and it was beautiful; protein, fat and low on carbs.

I spent three hours waiting to see an oncologist and a member from the surgical team today. Yep, it was my six month check up. I can't believe so much time has passed. Actually, next month marks a year since the whole saga! And yes, just to make things more exciting I had child one and two. They loved having to sit in a chair and do nothing...

When we got home, I checked out my slow-cooked curry. It was beautiful. I found this Indian shop that sells prepackaged curry mixes (completely paleo friendly) which meant that all I needed to do to make this tasty meal was chuck in some stewing lamb, the spice mix and water. The absolute convenience of this meal lends itself to be paleo fast-food, slow-cooked. The meat came off the bones easy. I then served it with some tomato and the last of my sweet potato fries. Oh yeah, and an egg.

My shoulders and arms are in repair so I kept the workout simple today. Using the 21-15-9 framework I did squats, lunges and situps. For that, I rewarded myself with a mango smoothie (mango, ice and coconut milk). Sadly, I had to sit next to my work computer as I drank down the last "meal" for the day.

It's a late night tonight. I have been trying so hard to get my eight hours sleep and now it seems I've lost it. Oh well. Will get it tomorrow.

Food Diary - Day 1

If you don't mind, I'll walk you through each meal that my family ate today.

We began the morning eating Chicken Omelette with raw organic red cabbage and sweet potato chips. There are three points that I need to make here. First of all, none of us were keen on eggs at the beginning of all this. Once making the change though, it was very funny to notice how our taste buds changed. Before we knew it eggs were a staple. While they're not cheap (omega-3 eggs

are the most expensive) they represent a very quick and easy meal). So, the other thing that is worth mentioning is the chicken thing. Thanks to twitter I have been able to read loads of articles explaining recent studies in food and cancer. I have read repeatedly now that chicken and pork are high in omega-6; omega-6 (this is my very basic understanding of the matter) is not a bad thing as long as it is at a particular ratio to omega-3. For now we don't eat the skin. Anyway, while we have decided to limit our pork intake, I am yet to do the same with chicken. I think I'll cut down our chicken next shop. Finally, my oven stopped working on Friday, when I was in the middle of baking sweet potato chips. I had bought the purple variety and was devastated. As it turned out they had been in there long enough to soften. That was great. I divided up the sweet potato chips and have been frying them to get them a little brown. A terrific save.

I sent child number one to school with lamb shank pieces, sweet potato chips, a banana, an apple and three small almond biscuits. Once a week I buy meat. On that same day I cook it all up. Our large oven means that I can roast loads. This week lamb shanks were in. So, I cut up the meat into bite size portions and froze them with the sweet potato chips. All I needed to do then was "heat up" the thermos, warm the food in the microwave and the meal for first break was done. I then typically include two serves of fruit and a treat. To be honest, I did anticipate (when the school term started) food wastage. I remember not wanting to eat my sandwiches as a child. I guess the real test will be when child number two starts school, but for now, child number one's lunchbox is always empty at the end of the day. And, just in case you were wondering about the meat, the thermos does keep the meat warm and child number one understands that it must be eaten at first break, no later.

Today, I was so busy that I didn't bother to stop for any snacks. Lunch was one and a half lamb chops, one omega-3 egg, tomato (fried with organic, dried basil, salt and pepper) and sweet potato chips. When the barbeque was on on Saturday, I took the opportunity to cook, in bulk, lamb chops. For us, lamb is the most accessible grass-fed meat, at the moment. We tend to eat quite a lot of lamb. The meat was warmed in the fry pan and the sides were cooked in its juices. I think the meal needed some guacamole... I will buy some avocados when I next shop. And, just for the record, child number two got the same dish, minus the egg.

When child number two was down for a nap, I grabbed a handful of almonds and read Donald Woods' "Biko". Soon, I was relaxed enough to have a nap. The combination of chemo and radiation last year have certainly taken their toll. There is no way I can turn down an opportunity to sleep in the afternoon. I have been finding myself trying to do as much as I can in the morning before I crash. When child one and two had some afternoon tea I reached for a handful of macadamias.

My workout for the day was a seven minute session that included dead lifts, hang cleans and pushups. It wasn't too bad. I enjoyed a banana at the end of the session.

Dinner was pretty much a repeat of lunch. But, I served the children early and therefore something different only because both were hungry and I thought that I may as well get them fed and bathed if they were keen. So, for me, it was more lamb chops (warmed in the fry pan) alongside sweet potato chips. I included a side of raw, organic, red cabbage. The children had roast chicken (roasted on the weekend, packaged, defrosted this morning and warmed in the fry pan), an omega-3 egg, sweet potato chips and tomato.

I am now having my last item, a cup of rooibos tea. It's pretty good. Life's good.