The Wind Is In My Hair

I am very excited about my last chemo now! There are only three more sleeps until Tuesday. I have been in good health (with fatigue not bothering me too much), in the past two weeks. My hope is that my body will be strong enough to take the last taxotere and cyclophosphamide combo, with little hinderance to my days and nights. The last two days have been great and a testament to one's greater need for good relationships than the need for food for comfort (although a thick based, cheesy, oily pizza would satisfy albeit for a mere 10 minutes or so).

My paleo diet has been compromised somewhat during chemo. While there was no way I was going to do gluten, on the days where I struggled to taste anything, I did indulge on gluten free biscuits and some dark chocolate (it was only 70% not the 80% that I should have had). That's all though! Once I feel as though I am through the worst of the chemo side effects, I want to do the Whole30. All this will mean is that I will be absolutely strict in my paleo diet. This will give me a chance to detox. The husband has just finished his Whole30 so I am so keen to do mine. Of course, once the thirty days are up we will continue to eat paleo, but it will mean that we can add 80% dark chocolate and sausages/bacon (as a treat). This will be a serious anti-cancer lifestyle change. I'm so looking forward to it.

Speaking of eating... I have had some serious cravings for salty food, So, I have been adding a little salt to my cooking (even though we really have cut that out) and I just couldn't resist some sliced apple with salt sprinkled on top. Another strange side effect, and I assume it is from the chemo, is that I have a watering left eye. For around a week now, I have had to carry a tissue ready to dab at my eye. My eye is not sore, red or swollen. It is just tearing all the time. I promise I'm not crying!

Friday I shared the morning with a beautiful friend. Then, in the evening the husband and I finished a mocumentary series (loved it!) and then watched an episode of our latest television series. That night, I had a most interrupted sleep. The night sweats disturbed my sleep. My beanie and blankets were going on and off.

On Saturday morning, I awoke pumped for a group crossfit session. I participated in a thirty-minute AMRAP that consisted of 5 dead lifts (very light weights for me), 13 pushups and 9 box jumps. I was happy with my effort and felt strong. My arm did swell a little during the workout. So, even though my initial thought was that the swelling was not related to exercise, I have a feeling that it is. Anyway, the exercise is good, and I had taken it easy. I think I will just need to be in tune with my body to know when it's too much. I don't think yesterday was too much.

In the afternoon, I sat in a massage chair and enjoyed a spa pedicure. I haven't had my nails painted for a few months. When I was diagnosed with breast cancer, I stopped using anything that would present itself as a toxin to my body. Nail polish was one of them. I won't be wearing it as much as I had in the past. It will be a special occasion thing now. Yeah, I know. I am so turning into a weirdo. It was very relaxing to sit and enjoy the company of a good friend. My two little toes were not too sore. That was good. I was worried that they may give me trouble. They are not as sensitive as they were. It's just so bizarre to have sore toes... I will definitely check with the oncologist about that.

The other point I wanted to raise with the oncologist was how I go about finding out whether cancer is in my genes. In a previous consultation, a doctor recommended that I speak with a genealogist to have tests conducted. While I would be most upset to discover that this gene could be hiding in one of my children, I do believe that it would be better to know now than later.

I am very much approaching this last chemo with high expectations. Although, let's face it, if I do happen to experience some severe side effects this time round, do you think I will really care?